New Meds

I saw my psychiatrist yesterday. After reviewing how I've been doing of late, he agreed that the Lexapro I've been taking has probably played out. I'm now transitioning to a newer SSRI, trade name Cymbalta. I don't even care if it's a placebo effect; anything that helps lift this depression is a good thing for me.

Depression is so frustrating. I want to be motivated. I want to care. I want to do things besides sit around in zombie state. I want to be able to string coherent thoughts together on paper and have those thoughts be about something other than my health.

For me, the most positive thing I've done during this bout of depression is to keep writing something. In the past, I haven't done even that. Writing at least forces me to connect, even for a brief period of time. It doesn't matter that almost no one reads these thoughts or that fewer care to respond. At least when I'm journaling, if nothing else, I'm keeping in more conscious touch with myself. I'm more consciously aware of how I'm feeling and what I'm thinking.

More later (maybe).